War of Words

What I take away from the argument over RuPaul's use of language and the subsequent criticism about that, and the war of words over this issue is that some in the community seem to have lost the idea that you can hold and express a view that isn't inclusive while understanding the views of others that is inclusive, and that is unfair to be dismissive of the younger generation for their non-inclusive view simply because they are seen as younger and less experienced in the community.

The younger generation has the right to their view, the right to express it, and they should be heard and considered, and even embraced because it can and will produce change, change often needed over the pushback from some of the "established" folks. The only thing older folks get when they don't just listen and adapt to the younger generation is left and forgotten as a vestige of the community's past, written into history and not in the present.

The reality is that the vast majority of transpeople could not care less about RuPaul and the war of words. He's seen as what he is, an older icon of the gay-drag community and not a transgender person let alone representative of the transgender community, but is still seen by the media as one and invited to on shows to speak for them, who then turns around and denigrates and dismisses transwomen.

And for that Parker Molloy was, in my view, right to hold him and his show accountable for the transphobic use of the words and his frequent comments for transwomen to become more like drag queens and less like real women. That is not positive for the transgender community, some of whom praise him in spite of the use of slurs.

Despite what RuPaul says and does in public or on his show probably doesn't change what he does and says in private, so much of this war on words is only for ourselves and considered meaningless outside our community. That has been lost in the noise. To me we don't need to descalate the arugment but take a step back and take a breath to recognize we all have voices and we will have differences, and whether you agree or not with the different views.

Some Women

Some women transition not because they love clothes and want to always be "dressed", like to wear makeup and want to wear it everytime in public, want to be "feminine" and be seen as a "real" woman, want to go anywhere and everyone calls her "she" or "maam", no none of that.

Some women transition not to have a body that attracts men who want to have sex with her, want to have a face others, even women, call beautiful, want to be able to be wear the latest bathing suit, the less the better, to be seen as sexy, no none of that.

Some women transition just to be who they are whatever that is, to be themselves however they are seen, to be comfortable with their body, everything about it including and especially their vagina, theirs and not something they planned to have, wanted to have, but simply have.

Some women transition to be, nothing more and nothing less. They'll live with the rest, whatever it is and happens. Some women transition not for everyone else but just themself, all of that.

Slurs

There's been a huge ruckus over the uses of slurs on RuPaul's show when those slurs have been used outside the context of the show with respect to transwomen, meaning those women in transition or even post-transition. The drag community got up in arms over the attack from the transcommunity.

And many in the drag and gay (men) community have expressed their dislike for the attacks and have defended the term as it to them only applies to the drag community. Except the word escapes that narrow confines by the audience, including the majority of gay men and used to describe, even define,
transwomen.

And now some in the drag and gay community, even using comedy, to defend the use of the term invoking their right to use it for themselves, but not noting to their audience that's their intent with the words.

So here's the deal, if the drag and gay community want to continue the use of the words, ok, then I'll start to use the slurs, just words really, which are derogatory and even demeaning terms, words long fought out of use by the gay (men) community to describe them.

Yeah, you know those terms you were angry about and fought to get them dropped in public and even in private by many people. And if you're wondering, please consider it's my right to use them to describe drag queens and gay men because it applies to you and no one else.

Seems fair to me, a word, or rather a slur, for a word. So it's a slur, but then so are the words you use. But you already know those words are still used in private by many people, you just ignore the reality of it as you do the effect of your words on transwomen.

And if you're really wondering, I'm only joking of course. Really. As much as you're joking. What's the adage about what goes around?

More Missing the Point

While the Huffington Post likes to present the diversity of views of the transgender community, and often provide a platform for some in the larger drag, cross-dressing, transsexual and transgender community, they also provide people with the opportunity to attack others in the community.

But what is lost in all the voices is the over-riding fact that the vast majority of in-transition and especially post-transition women don't identify with the transgender community and don't care to be involved let alone be identified with it.

In short, the transgender community is a small group of people shouting at themselves, but what is interesting is that while some do want to distinguish themselves from others, and rightly so in my view, others not only don't want to tolerate it but keep wanting to include them under the umbrella term transgender.

The truth is that in-transition and again post-transition women have almost nothing in common with the drag (whatever term you use) and cross-dressing community. They have little in common with the gender queer community but don't seem argue against them.

The argument is between the drag community, and historically the cross-dressing community, and transwomen, meaning the transmen often get lost in the shuffle and often don't care to get involved, over the use of labels often misused and even abused by the media and public.

And this is where I agree with transwomen who don't want the same labels, and especially hate the use of derogatory terms used by the drag community because those words don't apply to transwomen and they have the right to say no and argue their derogatory and demeaning words.

And this is where folks like RuPaul and Our Lady J seem to want to continue to use those words freely to all "transgender" women deliberately confusing drag performers with transwomen, even by some transwomen who came through the drag community.

I don't have issues if people use terms to describe themselves but they don't have the right to use them about others who don't want to be labelled with those words. Our Lady J wrote a piece saying she can use them however she likes and if you don't like it, tough.

She argues the words are commonly used by drag performers, or former drag performers, and the criticism leveled at RuPaul was unfair. It wasn't and Our Lady J, while having the right to defend RuPaul, is wrong to say transwomen not only should but have to accept the words.

They don't and don't want to accept them which is their right and should be respected, something the drag community, which is mostly gay men and a few transitioning transwomen, don't want to respect. Sorry, respect transwomen and their views, and if you don't like it, tough.

Missing the point

Yeah again, I'm late to the argument but so are others who are reacting to the responses to RuPaul's use of the terms "tranny", "Shemale", and so on, common in the gay community, which I've noted it's time the transgender community jettison him back into the gay community which he has never left.

As has been stated elsewhere often enough, RuPaul is a gay man who earns his living as a female impersonator, like many who exaggerate the presentation of women found on his show on the Logo channel which sponors the show because gay men love it.

While some in the transgender community like the show, it's fair and reasonable to say many, even most, don't watch it and consider it for what it is, a gay and straight man's show, and while a few (reported at 4) of the contestants on the show have transitioned, they were either kicked off or left because of bias against transgender women.

My point here is one made by Critian Williams who argues both sides are wrong, making the case it's free speech and both RuPaul and only the Logo TV channel has the right to censor him for whatever reasons they feel necessary, which they won't more than a verbal slap on the wrist.

The Logo TV channel will keep sponsoring his show because it sells in the gay community. They love the hyper representation of women and they love calling transgender and even post-transition women trannies or whatever other term they have and still use.

I won't argue that point, everyone has the right to an opinion and the right to express it. But they don't have the right to use it to promote misrepresentations and discrimination against a class of people. No one uses derogatory words against racial groups in the public forum without being called out and pressured to issue a , usually half-hearted, apology.

 No one uses derogatory words against gay and lesbian people without being called out and pressured to issue a half-hearted apology. And no one should use derogatory words against transgender people, which doesn't seem to include transgender men for reasons which defy common sense, just women.

The point is that RuPaul and Logo TV are promoting derogatory words toward the class of women who are in transition or have transitioned and while they're entitled to use those words in their private lives, they don't have the right to use them on TV or in public.

While they argue they're using them in the narrow context of the show, not unlike other shows, but that's not the point, which is that the represenation is misunderstood by many viewers to apply to transgender wormen and the RuPaul and the show knows this and does nothing to clarify the contestants from transgender women.

And that doesn't excuse RuPaul. The criticism of him is right and he would know it if some groups and people started resurrecting the old anti-gay words of decades past. You can bet the outrage if that happened, but then maybe some would just smile and tell RuPaul the adage about geese.