I was reading a thread on a forum where some in the transgender community were openly criticizing celebrities for their public words, decisions, actions or behavior, and the transgender community was criticizing each other for their expressed opinions.
This thread is one of those arguments that remind me of people in a cafe all chatting with each other through their computers and each of them angrily pounding their keyboards mad about what everyone else was saying.
You can't win because people want to put the entire weight of the transcommunity on anyone they think deserves it, but we have to remember all of us have the right to our opinion and the right to express it whether anyone else like it or not, so no matter what anyone thinks, they need to go outside for a moment, take a few deep breaths and remember there's a whole big world outside whatever opinion they had, and in reality the rest of the world doesn't give on care about what people in the transcommunity says about each other.
It's why many (trans)people don't get involved or identify with the transcommunity, but go through their transition and get on with their life, which pretty much leaves only those in the cafe angrily pounding their keyboards. My point being is to let folks speak, argue the issues and never attack a person, otherwise, we're only beating each other up for nothing.
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
Some People
Some people don't fit into the binary sex or gender boxes most people like to put everyone into because it fits their idea of sex and gender norms. These people don't fit because while many don't have an internal conflict with their birth sex and their gender roles, they like to express themselves as the other sex or gender.
These people fit a variety of labels, some they identify with and some others put on them for their personal reason whether they fit or the person wants or likes it, and often it's a disparaging label, meant to either ridicule or demean them.
But there are some people who may appear to fit into that group of people who fit in between there is one big distinction which is often lost by others, and that's the fact that these people would rather be the other sex and gender and express the birth sex as a choice than as a life.
This means those born male would rather be women when and where they can present themselves as men or not, or just live in the clothes because it's convenient or the clothes are comfortable to wear on some occasions.
And that's what's lost in the difference because people assume they are just one of those who are men or women and like on occasion to be the other sex or gender because it fits their idea of them than trying to understand and accept some people don't fit their binary boxes.
Some people defy the norms of others, who in turn forget their norms aren't everyone's norm, and there are some people who would themselves not as the other sex but in the body of the other sex to feel whole as a person and themselves.
Some people, but then we're all just people, some in our own ways different than everyone else, lest we forget and be called out for the ways we don't fit into other people's binary boxes. Some people are really all people, all the same in the fact we're all different in some ways.
These people fit a variety of labels, some they identify with and some others put on them for their personal reason whether they fit or the person wants or likes it, and often it's a disparaging label, meant to either ridicule or demean them.
But there are some people who may appear to fit into that group of people who fit in between there is one big distinction which is often lost by others, and that's the fact that these people would rather be the other sex and gender and express the birth sex as a choice than as a life.
This means those born male would rather be women when and where they can present themselves as men or not, or just live in the clothes because it's convenient or the clothes are comfortable to wear on some occasions.
And that's what's lost in the difference because people assume they are just one of those who are men or women and like on occasion to be the other sex or gender because it fits their idea of them than trying to understand and accept some people don't fit their binary boxes.
Some people defy the norms of others, who in turn forget their norms aren't everyone's norm, and there are some people who would themselves not as the other sex but in the body of the other sex to feel whole as a person and themselves.
Some people, but then we're all just people, some in our own ways different than everyone else, lest we forget and be called out for the ways we don't fit into other people's binary boxes. Some people are really all people, all the same in the fact we're all different in some ways.
Friday, April 4, 2014
If You Notice
If you notice while the Gay, meaning mostly gay men but they occasionally include lesbian as a courtesy, are pushing for new rights through laws or challenging existing laws, they don't use the word "transgender" let alone include transgender people in their efforts.
Why is that? Wait, we already know, they don't like transpeople as we saw with the fight for ENDA and we've seen in the fight for marriage equality. There is no mention or explanation of what these efforts do for transpeople.
The transgender community is the one doing the work to advance laws and changes in regulations for transgender people. They've effectively left the gay, again meaning men, community out of the work and out of the conversation.
This is a position long advocating by some transgender people which I thought made sense being as gay, yes men again, only allowed transpeople if they sat quietly in the back of the bus and were invisible. And there are reasons for this.
First, they've always thought transgender women were just gay men who like to live as women and they hated that fact and reality that it wasn't true, that transwomen were women, that pesky proven issue of biology that the gay men cite as they're being gay.
Second, they've always looked at transwomen as "trannies" blatantly using the demeaning term in a degoratory way to dismiss transwomen. Gay men only consider drag queens to be the only reason men dress as women, something Ru Paul is keenly aware and defends.
Third, they've always asked the transgender community to fight for their cause and issues and promise to help them "later" but never do, as we saw over the fight in Congress with ENDA where the then HRC executive director promised inclusion until Representative Franks said no way there would be inclusion.
And now with the wins for marriage equality becoming the normal as federal judges rule against laws or state constitutional provision against same-sex marriage, the gay community is totally forgetting transgender people.
Even noted and respected journalists like Rachel Maddow ignore transgender people while talking about LGBT rights to simply use the word but never discuss the people. On MSNBC only Melissa Harris-Perry devoted a part of her weekend show to transgender people.
The point? Well, there isn't one except history is showing the transgender community do best by themselves and transgender people, and more so legally recognized women (post-transition) do even better without the transgender community.
It's about women. Where it should be. Sorry (trans)men, you're just another form of men.
Why is that? Wait, we already know, they don't like transpeople as we saw with the fight for ENDA and we've seen in the fight for marriage equality. There is no mention or explanation of what these efforts do for transpeople.
The transgender community is the one doing the work to advance laws and changes in regulations for transgender people. They've effectively left the gay, again meaning men, community out of the work and out of the conversation.
This is a position long advocating by some transgender people which I thought made sense being as gay, yes men again, only allowed transpeople if they sat quietly in the back of the bus and were invisible. And there are reasons for this.
First, they've always thought transgender women were just gay men who like to live as women and they hated that fact and reality that it wasn't true, that transwomen were women, that pesky proven issue of biology that the gay men cite as they're being gay.
Second, they've always looked at transwomen as "trannies" blatantly using the demeaning term in a degoratory way to dismiss transwomen. Gay men only consider drag queens to be the only reason men dress as women, something Ru Paul is keenly aware and defends.
Third, they've always asked the transgender community to fight for their cause and issues and promise to help them "later" but never do, as we saw over the fight in Congress with ENDA where the then HRC executive director promised inclusion until Representative Franks said no way there would be inclusion.
And now with the wins for marriage equality becoming the normal as federal judges rule against laws or state constitutional provision against same-sex marriage, the gay community is totally forgetting transgender people.
Even noted and respected journalists like Rachel Maddow ignore transgender people while talking about LGBT rights to simply use the word but never discuss the people. On MSNBC only Melissa Harris-Perry devoted a part of her weekend show to transgender people.
The point? Well, there isn't one except history is showing the transgender community do best by themselves and transgender people, and more so legally recognized women (post-transition) do even better without the transgender community.
It's about women. Where it should be. Sorry (trans)men, you're just another form of men.
Friday, March 28, 2014
Why
Transgender women of color have complained for years the issues and focus on the transgender community and movement was not just dominated but defined and controlled by white (trans)women. Now that Laverne Cox, Janet Mock, and others have celebrity status they decided they have the right to speak for all (trans)women.
If the vast majority of in-transition and post-transiton women (many of whom are stealth) don't accept the few out (trans)women, mostly white but not all, the right to define who they were or are as women (transgender optional), why should they accept women of color have the same right?
I don't see why any (trans)women would allow let alone accept another (trans)women to define them. They might agree on some of the issues facing transgender people, even I do most of the time, but I wouldn't accept any celebrity speaking for me.
It seems that some transgender women of color have chosen to do what they've long criticized white transwomen of doing. Demanding the right to speak for the many is color independent, it's all in the individual, and no one has the right or should take the right to stand up and say they speak for those they don't know.
I don't speak for you, so speak for yourself but not me.
If the vast majority of in-transition and post-transiton women (many of whom are stealth) don't accept the few out (trans)women, mostly white but not all, the right to define who they were or are as women (transgender optional), why should they accept women of color have the same right?
I don't see why any (trans)women would allow let alone accept another (trans)women to define them. They might agree on some of the issues facing transgender people, even I do most of the time, but I wouldn't accept any celebrity speaking for me.
It seems that some transgender women of color have chosen to do what they've long criticized white transwomen of doing. Demanding the right to speak for the many is color independent, it's all in the individual, and no one has the right or should take the right to stand up and say they speak for those they don't know.
I don't speak for you, so speak for yourself but not me.
Transition and Fat
In looking at and reading some of the blogs of transwomen, meaning those in transition, and the descriptions they give about the hormone replacement therapy (HRT) drugs they take, often with dosages listed (not recommended), and the effects over time, I'm curious why they ignore two more important factors of their life and transition.
The priorities of a transition should be, in this order, your life, your health, your fitness and your transition. Without the first three, the transition is just that where you go through it risking if not wrecking your health and fitness in the process.
And never forget you have a life above all else, because without it you get through your transition to discover you don't know what you want to do with the rest of your life. Never lose focus on where you're going as a person and fit the transition into that.
The transition will make its own schedule with your finances and life, but your life won't if you sacrifice it for your transition. My concern here is reading, and sometimes seeing in the photos, which is a puzzle to my why they post selfies but then I'm not one who likes my own body so I never take them about the changes.
It's common knowledge HRT will reduce muscle mass, often helpful, and it will add or change the fat distribution on the body, and expected with estradoil, especially with the hips and breasts. And therapists and physicians who have overseen transition will tell you adding weight, aka fat, is the result of HRT.
And often they'll tell you it's "normal" and don't worry. But it's not and doesn't have to be as you'll find if you want to lose that fat, you don't have the same metabolism with exercise to reduce the unneeded fat and you have to work harder and longer than you did before, and the biggest risk to one's health is fat.
And it's the fat you often don't think about because it's slowly added or out of sight, such as intramuscular fat (muscle mass changes), internal fat (inside the abdomen on/around organs), arms, legs, etc., and over the course of your transition it's easy to find your self tens of pounds heavier.
I won't argue some people lose weight, but if you read the details, it's often they're physically active or continued to exercise through their transition so the HRT works on the areas it will naturally but won't add fat where it's burned in the exercise program.
And that's my point, don't sacrifice your health and fitness for something you think is good. Fat is still fat and not good for you. Some fat is helpful to help feel like and see yourself as a woman but much of it isn't, it's just fat, and over your new life will be there unless you change.
The priorities of a transition should be, in this order, your life, your health, your fitness and your transition. Without the first three, the transition is just that where you go through it risking if not wrecking your health and fitness in the process.
And never forget you have a life above all else, because without it you get through your transition to discover you don't know what you want to do with the rest of your life. Never lose focus on where you're going as a person and fit the transition into that.
The transition will make its own schedule with your finances and life, but your life won't if you sacrifice it for your transition. My concern here is reading, and sometimes seeing in the photos, which is a puzzle to my why they post selfies but then I'm not one who likes my own body so I never take them about the changes.
It's common knowledge HRT will reduce muscle mass, often helpful, and it will add or change the fat distribution on the body, and expected with estradoil, especially with the hips and breasts. And therapists and physicians who have overseen transition will tell you adding weight, aka fat, is the result of HRT.
And often they'll tell you it's "normal" and don't worry. But it's not and doesn't have to be as you'll find if you want to lose that fat, you don't have the same metabolism with exercise to reduce the unneeded fat and you have to work harder and longer than you did before, and the biggest risk to one's health is fat.
And it's the fat you often don't think about because it's slowly added or out of sight, such as intramuscular fat (muscle mass changes), internal fat (inside the abdomen on/around organs), arms, legs, etc., and over the course of your transition it's easy to find your self tens of pounds heavier.
I won't argue some people lose weight, but if you read the details, it's often they're physically active or continued to exercise through their transition so the HRT works on the areas it will naturally but won't add fat where it's burned in the exercise program.
And that's my point, don't sacrifice your health and fitness for something you think is good. Fat is still fat and not good for you. Some fat is helpful to help feel like and see yourself as a woman but much of it isn't, it's just fat, and over your new life will be there unless you change.
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