No thinking out loud

Why is that many people on forums don't allow just thinking out loud? Why are they so touchy that if you ask questions you get verbally pummelled? And if you ask questions just to open the discussion to more than just a us-versus-them mentality, you really get verbally pummelled?

As I've long told folks, I'm a tavern conversationalist. It's about just being in a place where people relax and enjoy the company and the converation in an open, light but still serious, humorous, and everything else you know and expect mode in a tavern on a Friday night. Just people talking and thinking out loud. Sometimes challenging, but always in jest. And always with a smile.

But in forums, if you don't agree, they rail at you like you're the enemy of their group. And then they wonder why people stop posting, stop responding and sometimes just leave. Open discussions aren't the allowed. And above all, don't play devil's advocate or express sarcasm. But it's also the case where some longtime members are allowed to do that, even play devil's advocate to provoke or prod or say worse things than you, but they're excused because they part of the group.

The rest of us, whether asking innocent or reasonable questions or just expressing our opinion, where everyone's opinion is equal and equally important, however, don't get the same response or treatment, even just being courteous or fair to all sides and views, but get treated like shit. That's not an exageration. They forget the discussion and go after the person.

And that's where they wonder why people get angry, and at them for being inconsiderate, unaccepting and hypocritical. They just don't seem to get what they have done and are doing. And when the owners and moderators support them, you begin to realize, it's never about being a forum. It's about a clique and club. A members-only club where others aren't allowed to participate at their level.

But then I've never been someone who just goes along. I've always asked the obvious question in opposition, always just to wake people up, make a point the discussion, or expresss alternative ideas. I like see all sides of an argument, even if I don't agree and even become angry. It's the right of people to express themselves and ours to listen. And it you aren't one of them, you become one of "them", the enemy. And I've been warned if not booted off forums for that (see past entries).

Anyway, it's just an observation. And I'll likely never stop being the one who asking those question and speaking from outside the box, but always tongue-in-cheek or with a smile. I'm only sad they just don't see that, take themselves too seriously and don't see their narrowness and attitude toward others.