If

If you look at Websites of women who have transitioned over a year or more and they show you a timeline of the effects they have experienced on hormone replacement therapy (HRT) where there are significant changes in their face, it's a good bet they neglect to say one thing they had in their transition.

And that is facial surgery. Hormone replacement therapy will change the body body significantly, most notably to add (not rearrange the existing) fat where the individual gains 10-20 lbs and often more 25-50 lbs to the chest, abdomen, hips and legs, meaning all over the body.

It's the result of the effect of the change in metabolism to add fat, turn muscle into fat and develop both hips and breasts. And it will change the fat on the face. But it won't change the underlying bone and structure of the face.

And this is where you see photos of their face during their transition on HRT where it's obvious their facial features, eg. hairline, eyebrows, nose, eyes, cheeks, chin, neck, throat, are clearly different. That's not HRT, that's almost always surgery, and sometimes good makeup.

Some will admit or talk about their facial surgery, but most won't implying it's all HRT. Sorry, HRT doesn't and won't make the changes you often see in the face where it's the underlying structure of the face.

So don't believe you can achieve the same as them for yourself, unless of course, you have the checkbook they have. Cheer what they've accomplished, but take how they did it with a measure of question if it's real and true, or not the whole story about their transition.

Because in the end with transition and HRT, its' the old adage, everyone's mileage varys.

Huffington Post

Why does the Huffington Post Live always have two men talking about issue involving transgender women? Neither one of them are transgender and obviously not women, so why in the hell should we listen to their opinion?

This has to be the worst thing Huffington Post can to do to insult women, especially  transgender women, and it has to be the dumbest thing two men can do is to talk like they know all about the story, the issue and the people.

Get a clue Huffington Post, drop men talking about women and drop cisgendermen talking about transgender people, especially transgender women.

What

What people don't understand, and where the transcommunity needs to improve the understanding about transpeople, is that a person doesn't change their gender, they change their body to match their gender. It's not about changing their genetic sex, that's given at birth as is their gender.

It's about being comfortable with their body where they can live as the person they know they are when they first realized it as a child. The transcommunity needs to get the idea through to the idiots who keep confusing the issue for political purposes.

Not All

Not all (trans)women who transition are feminine in the conventional sense of the word, but they still want to be women, as there are butch women and dykes there are differently feminine (trans)women. It doesn't mean they're men or have male personalities, it just they're not what the transcommunity defines as women, but it is what society accepts as women.

Manning

It seems the Bradley/Chelsea Manning issue doesn't seem to go away as the military has stated they're considering transferring Manning to a civilian prison so the he/she can get the medical care for his/her transition since the military is prohibited from such care.

But that's only half the problem and maybe something he/she may not want to ask to the military to do. Consider Manning has been sentenced to 35 years eligible for parole in 7 years. If Manning chose to stay in Leavenworth (military) prison, he will be released and then discharged in 7 years, after which he/she could pursue his/her transition.

If he accepts a transfer, the military could just as easily sustain the full prison sentence and Manning would be there the full 35 years, without the possibility of parole since Manning would be out of sight and mind of the military, but he/she could pursue some of her transition while in prison.

I won't argue about what Manning should do, but I will argue we shouldn't forget what he was convicted for while in a military uniform, which is something that seems to be lost on the transgender community, as they seem to think Manning's transition is more important than the crimes he/she committed.

And I disagree that not allowing someone to transition is cruel and unusual punishment as Manning won't die from not transitioning, although some transgender people have committed suicide over not being able to transition, there is no evidence Manning is such a person.

That said, does Manning deserves therapy and hormones? Probably, but that violates military regulations which anyone diagnosed with Gender Identity Condition is mentally ill and can't serve in the military. Hence the thought of the discharge and transfer for treatment.

And that's the conundrum with Manning. They can't discharge him (official status) until all legal avenues have been exhausted to transfer him, and they can't treat him. So he has the choice, maybe, to withdraw any appeal, get discharged and transferred in hopes of treatment but risk a longer sentence.

Or accept the reality and get through the 7 years, get paroled, discharged and released. And for anyone going through a transition, it's maybe a no brainer between freedom to be who they want to be, albeit paying for it is another issue, or risk being in prison, and all that entails, the full term for some treatment at government expense.

While I think it's time the military accept transgender people as the science and economics shows it's better for both the transgender people who are serving or want to serve and the military. The cost of a transition is far less than what the DOD and VA spend treating a disable soldier or veteran.

But until then, Manning is stuck in the laws and regulations governing transgender people in the military, and the choices they and Manning has within those laws and regulations. So yelling at the military about Manning's rights doesn't change anything.

The decision, and gamble, is Manning's. He's in prison for a reason, we shouldn't forget. And he/she deserves some measure of treatment for his/her condition, but not available where he/she current is incarcerated. The military is offering him what he demands, with caveats, and as they say, nothing comes without a price, as Manning has discovered.

Not All

There are no standards for transitioning women to live by anymore. There used to be with the one year real-life experience, often deemed a test, for approval for Sex Reassignment Surgery (SRS) where you were judged if you passed successfully as a woman.

As a therapist would tell you, the experience is to get used to presenting and living as a woman. In truth it was then and still is bullshit as anyone knows because while many pass most if not all the time, all transitioning women face the reality of being clocked or outed, creating more harm than good.

I've always argued that if you have been diagnosed with Gender Identity Condition and you accept the process with the understanding you make your choices and accept responsibilities for those choices, then you should have the right to the SRS and get your documents changed so you can get on with your life.

The truth is that even if you don't pass, that won't change after one year, and if you pass, then you don't need the one year. The one year test was a compromise years ago with the APA over those who argued no time is necessary and some who wanted 2-3 years.

It was those therapists who then used it to set standards of what was acceptable with the woman's presentation, meaning everything feminine and nothing masculine, and why many transitioning woman threw out their entire old wardrobe for their new one.

While some cherished this as a milestone, it was expensive for many and it was really stupid for some as they often threw away their favorite or best clothes for ones to get through the test and get the letters for surgery.

The point is that there are no standards anymore as some transitioning women don't throw out some of their old clothes and continue to wear them as women's styles now allow it. They aren't into makeup outside that which is necessary for the occasion.

They don't live to go shopping and for clothes and all the "normal" stuff they're expect to do as women. They live as who they are, and wear whatever they like, and do whatever they want. Some in and post transition don't fit the model or stereotype because it's not them.

The reality is that some don't like women's clothes because they often don't fit, it's tedious to find and then remember all the sizes which fits for each makers of clothes you like or want to try, and they often like colors found with men's clothes not availble in women's clothes.

In short some women keep and still buy men's clothes because they fit, they like the style, they prefer the colors and they're comfortable. They still wear women's clothes because they like them too but for some types, the men's are their preferred.

And the funny thing is they're still seen as women. And that's what some therapists have realized and accept with those women they're in therapy for their transition. Just be yourself and the letters will still get written and you'll still get the surgery.

That's because the diversity of women is far greater today where the diversity of transwomen now fits completely inside it. If only the APA can realize that to write standards which fits the new diversity than their narrow-minded ideal.

Not all transwomen fit their ideal but they're still women.

Never Are

Transgender people never are the person of their birth sex. They simply are born of that sex and then live and present at that gender until they transition to be who they have been all along, themselves in whatever sex and gender they are in their mind and their heart.

Not Getting It

A conversation between a woman and someone she just met.

Him: "So, are you pre-op or post-op?"

Her: "Does it really matter?"

Him: "I couldn't tell. I thought you are a woman."

Her: "I am a woman. That's the point."

Him: "You took it wrong."

Her: "No, you meant it wrong."

Him: "I was only asking."

Her: "Something that's none of your business."

Him: "It is if I like you."

Her: "Then, are you pre-op or post-op?"

Him: "What the hell does that mean, I'm a guy."

Her: "Yeah, that's the point."

Him: "But I haven't had surgery."

Her: "Really, could have fooled me. I thought you were a guy."

Him: "I am."

Her: "As I'm a woman."

Myopia

The one condition the transgender community suffers from is myopia. If you read all the news, the editorials, blogs, forums, etc. (I only access very few but enough through links) you come away with the sense they're either singing to the choir of like-minded transpeople or shouting at the crowd of opposing transpeople.

They very rarely write for the larger world and media outside the transgender umbrella, so you come away feeling like it's a large gender enclosed arena and unless you're "one of them" you're ignored, dismissed or hated, unless of course you agree with them.

The problem with that myopia is that the transgender community is not uniformily defined by the members and not universally agreed on the use of words for identifying people or classes of people, so words become swords and views become false wars.

As Shakespeare would say, "Much ado about nothing." or more any one of a number of saying about tempests in teapots, molehills and mountains, etc. You get the point. A good example is all the noise about the use of the word "tranny" and who defines and gets to use it.

This pitted the gay-drag community and the transwomen who came through to transition against those who felt the word, commonly used by RuPaul and other drag queens and often applied to transitioning, even post-transition, women, was derogatory and demeaning.

The former accused the latter of not understanding the history of the word and the latter accused the former of being dismissive. And then there were some transwomen who tried to arbitrate but only succeeded in stating the case for each and not solving anything.

In short, it's a lot of voices and noise at each other all the while the gay-drag community issued a half-hearted apology and promise, not RuPaul but the producers of the RuPaul show, that won't change anything.

The truth is, as many wrote, the public view of transwomen is taken from other groups under the transgender umbrella, such as the drag-queens, cross-dressers, she-males, etal. and some of the public post-transition women while helping transgender women are actually hurting post-transition women.

And that's something only a few of the public (post-transition) women do successively to represent women because they don't the use the stupid little adjective while most of them use it to promote themselves and transgender women not distinguishing between those in transition and those post-transition.

They're in effect talking to themselves thinking they're talking to the public. Transcommunity myopia in a nutshell.

War of Words

What I take away from the argument over RuPaul's use of language and the subsequent criticism about that, and the war of words over this issue is that some in the community seem to have lost the idea that you can hold and express a view that isn't inclusive while understanding the views of others that is inclusive, and that is unfair to be dismissive of the younger generation for their non-inclusive view simply because they are seen as younger and less experienced in the community.

The younger generation has the right to their view, the right to express it, and they should be heard and considered, and even embraced because it can and will produce change, change often needed over the pushback from some of the "established" folks. The only thing older folks get when they don't just listen and adapt to the younger generation is left and forgotten as a vestige of the community's past, written into history and not in the present.

The reality is that the vast majority of transpeople could not care less about RuPaul and the war of words. He's seen as what he is, an older icon of the gay-drag community and not a transgender person let alone representative of the transgender community, but is still seen by the media as one and invited to on shows to speak for them, who then turns around and denigrates and dismisses transwomen.

And for that Parker Molloy was, in my view, right to hold him and his show accountable for the transphobic use of the words and his frequent comments for transwomen to become more like drag queens and less like real women. That is not positive for the transgender community, some of whom praise him in spite of the use of slurs.

Despite what RuPaul says and does in public or on his show probably doesn't change what he does and says in private, so much of this war on words is only for ourselves and considered meaningless outside our community. That has been lost in the noise. To me we don't need to descalate the arugment but take a step back and take a breath to recognize we all have voices and we will have differences, and whether you agree or not with the different views.

Some Women

Some women transition not because they love clothes and want to always be "dressed", like to wear makeup and want to wear it everytime in public, want to be "feminine" and be seen as a "real" woman, want to go anywhere and everyone calls her "she" or "maam", no none of that.

Some women transition not to have a body that attracts men who want to have sex with her, want to have a face others, even women, call beautiful, want to be able to be wear the latest bathing suit, the less the better, to be seen as sexy, no none of that.

Some women transition just to be who they are whatever that is, to be themselves however they are seen, to be comfortable with their body, everything about it including and especially their vagina, theirs and not something they planned to have, wanted to have, but simply have.

Some women transition to be, nothing more and nothing less. They'll live with the rest, whatever it is and happens. Some women transition not for everyone else but just themself, all of that.

Slurs

There's been a huge ruckus over the uses of slurs on RuPaul's show when those slurs have been used outside the context of the show with respect to transwomen, meaning those women in transition or even post-transition. The drag community got up in arms over the attack from the transcommunity.

And many in the drag and gay (men) community have expressed their dislike for the attacks and have defended the term as it to them only applies to the drag community. Except the word escapes that narrow confines by the audience, including the majority of gay men and used to describe, even define,
transwomen.

And now some in the drag and gay community, even using comedy, to defend the use of the term invoking their right to use it for themselves, but not noting to their audience that's their intent with the words.

So here's the deal, if the drag and gay community want to continue the use of the words, ok, then I'll start to use the slurs, just words really, which are derogatory and even demeaning terms, words long fought out of use by the gay (men) community to describe them.

Yeah, you know those terms you were angry about and fought to get them dropped in public and even in private by many people. And if you're wondering, please consider it's my right to use them to describe drag queens and gay men because it applies to you and no one else.

Seems fair to me, a word, or rather a slur, for a word. So it's a slur, but then so are the words you use. But you already know those words are still used in private by many people, you just ignore the reality of it as you do the effect of your words on transwomen.

And if you're really wondering, I'm only joking of course. Really. As much as you're joking. What's the adage about what goes around?

More Missing the Point

While the Huffington Post likes to present the diversity of views of the transgender community, and often provide a platform for some in the larger drag, cross-dressing, transsexual and transgender community, they also provide people with the opportunity to attack others in the community.

But what is lost in all the voices is the over-riding fact that the vast majority of in-transition and especially post-transition women don't identify with the transgender community and don't care to be involved let alone be identified with it.

In short, the transgender community is a small group of people shouting at themselves, but what is interesting is that while some do want to distinguish themselves from others, and rightly so in my view, others not only don't want to tolerate it but keep wanting to include them under the umbrella term transgender.

The truth is that in-transition and again post-transition women have almost nothing in common with the drag (whatever term you use) and cross-dressing community. They have little in common with the gender queer community but don't seem argue against them.

The argument is between the drag community, and historically the cross-dressing community, and transwomen, meaning the transmen often get lost in the shuffle and often don't care to get involved, over the use of labels often misused and even abused by the media and public.

And this is where I agree with transwomen who don't want the same labels, and especially hate the use of derogatory terms used by the drag community because those words don't apply to transwomen and they have the right to say no and argue their derogatory and demeaning words.

And this is where folks like RuPaul and Our Lady J seem to want to continue to use those words freely to all "transgender" women deliberately confusing drag performers with transwomen, even by some transwomen who came through the drag community.

I don't have issues if people use terms to describe themselves but they don't have the right to use them about others who don't want to be labelled with those words. Our Lady J wrote a piece saying she can use them however she likes and if you don't like it, tough.

She argues the words are commonly used by drag performers, or former drag performers, and the criticism leveled at RuPaul was unfair. It wasn't and Our Lady J, while having the right to defend RuPaul, is wrong to say transwomen not only should but have to accept the words.

They don't and don't want to accept them which is their right and should be respected, something the drag community, which is mostly gay men and a few transitioning transwomen, don't want to respect. Sorry, respect transwomen and their views, and if you don't like it, tough.

Missing the point

Yeah again, I'm late to the argument but so are others who are reacting to the responses to RuPaul's use of the terms "tranny", "Shemale", and so on, common in the gay community, which I've noted it's time the transgender community jettison him back into the gay community which he has never left.

As has been stated elsewhere often enough, RuPaul is a gay man who earns his living as a female impersonator, like many who exaggerate the presentation of women found on his show on the Logo channel which sponors the show because gay men love it.

While some in the transgender community like the show, it's fair and reasonable to say many, even most, don't watch it and consider it for what it is, a gay and straight man's show, and while a few (reported at 4) of the contestants on the show have transitioned, they were either kicked off or left because of bias against transgender women.

My point here is one made by Critian Williams who argues both sides are wrong, making the case it's free speech and both RuPaul and only the Logo TV channel has the right to censor him for whatever reasons they feel necessary, which they won't more than a verbal slap on the wrist.

The Logo TV channel will keep sponsoring his show because it sells in the gay community. They love the hyper representation of women and they love calling transgender and even post-transition women trannies or whatever other term they have and still use.

I won't argue that point, everyone has the right to an opinion and the right to express it. But they don't have the right to use it to promote misrepresentations and discrimination against a class of people. No one uses derogatory words against racial groups in the public forum without being called out and pressured to issue a , usually half-hearted, apology.

 No one uses derogatory words against gay and lesbian people without being called out and pressured to issue a half-hearted apology. And no one should use derogatory words against transgender people, which doesn't seem to include transgender men for reasons which defy common sense, just women.

The point is that RuPaul and Logo TV are promoting derogatory words toward the class of women who are in transition or have transitioned and while they're entitled to use those words in their private lives, they don't have the right to use them on TV or in public.

While they argue they're using them in the narrow context of the show, not unlike other shows, but that's not the point, which is that the represenation is misunderstood by many viewers to apply to transgender wormen and the RuPaul and the show knows this and does nothing to clarify the contestants from transgender women.

And that doesn't excuse RuPaul. The criticism of him is right and he would know it if some groups and people started resurrecting the old anti-gay words of decades past. You can bet the outrage if that happened, but then maybe some would just smile and tell RuPaul the adage about geese.

Jared Leto

Ok, a little late to the show with this, but sometimes thoughts take a long time to get from the mind to the consciousness, but here it is, more an after thought than anything.

Let me see if I understand it. Jared Leto gets the opportunity to play a drug addict, HIV-positive, pre-op transsexual in the movie Dallas Buyers Club. He is coached by a former draq queen who transitioned, and who was one of the characters in a movie about her boyfriend who was murdered.

After the movie he goes back to living as himself and his work as an actor/director and with his rock band. He wins an oscar for his performance for best supporting actor. He thanks the people who coached him and the transgender community for the opportunity to "represent" them.

And he wonders why many in the transgender community are not only not impressed, but don't like the role he played, which clearly was intended to be an exaggerated characterization of a transwoman, the fact he won the oscar, and then fakes being thankful.

For what? Really. He never was a transgender person. He studied them for a while, played a role and then forgot all about it, even made sure to tell people it was just a role. And he thinks the transgender community should be grateful to him?

The guy has balls, literally and figuratively. If he understood he could have asked for a more realistic role, found better coaches, talk to more real (trans)women, etc., but then it wouldn't even be enough because he just played a role.

He never really understood what transwomen think and feel and how they live, so why should they thank him for his character in the movie? But then he's not unlike many who like to pat themselves on the back not matter what they do, only because they did it, to thank everyone for appreciating his effort.

Sorry, I agree with the many in the view he set back transgender people more in the public mind than he helped them, and next time don't volunteer to help. You've done enough damage.

Can We Stop

Can we stop putting RuPaul in the transgender catagory and stop letting him talk about transgender issues or transgender people? The guy is a gay female impersonator, who has never changed that perception and description of himself.

It's time the media but more importantly the transgender community stop catering to this guy as someone who "knows" transgender people or knows what it's like to be a transgender person. He's a gay man who like to dress up.

He has worked hard on that image and nothing more than that, especially not ever calling himself a transgender woman. And he's called in-transition and even post-transition women "trannies" and then defended it as just the normal word gay men and female impersonators use.

That's crap and nothing more or better. So drop him for what he is, someone who hates transgender women and lumps them into being just "trannies" like him. He deserved to be called out and the transgender community shouldn't give him a pass or allow him an apology.

He won't change, so leave him with the gay community like all the other gay men (I'd use a worse word but that would be stooping to RuPaul's level he calls transgender women).

Others

I was reading a thread on a forum where some in the transgender community were openly criticizing celebrities for their public words, decisions, actions or behavior, and the transgender community was criticizing each other for their expressed opinions.

This thread is one of those arguments that remind me of people in a cafe all chatting with each other through their computers and each of them angrily pounding their keyboards mad about what everyone else was saying.

You can't win because people want to put the entire weight of the transcommunity on anyone they think deserves it, but we have to remember all of us have the right to our opinion and the right to express it whether anyone else like it or not, so no matter what anyone thinks, they need to go outside for a moment, take a few deep breaths and remember there's a whole big world outside whatever opinion they had, and in reality the rest of the world doesn't give on care about what people in the transcommunity says about each other.

It's why many (trans)people don't get involved or identify with the transcommunity, but go through their transition and get on with their life, which pretty much leaves only those in the cafe angrily pounding their keyboards. My point being is to let folks speak, argue the issues and never attack a person, otherwise, we're only beating each other up for nothing.

Some People

Some people don't fit into the binary sex or gender boxes most people like to put everyone into because it fits their idea of sex and gender norms. These people don't fit because while many don't have an internal conflict with their birth sex and their gender roles, they like to express themselves as the other sex or gender.

These people fit a variety of labels, some they identify with and some others put on them for their personal reason whether they fit or the person wants or likes it, and often it's a disparaging label, meant to either ridicule or demean them.

But there are some people who may appear to fit into that group of people who fit in between there is one big distinction which is often lost by others, and that's the fact that these people would rather be the other sex and gender and express the birth sex as a choice than as a life.

This means those born male would rather be women when and where they can present themselves as men or not, or just live in the clothes because it's convenient or the clothes are comfortable to wear on some occasions.

And that's what's lost in the difference because people assume they are just one of those who are men or women and like on occasion to be the other sex or gender because it fits their idea of them than trying to understand and accept some people don't fit their binary boxes.

Some people defy the norms of others, who in turn forget their norms aren't everyone's norm, and there are some people who would themselves not as the other sex but in the body of the other sex to feel whole as a person and themselves.

Some people, but then we're all just people, some in our own ways different than everyone else, lest we forget and be called out for the ways we don't fit into other people's binary boxes. Some people are really all people, all the same in the fact we're all different in some ways.

If You Notice

If you notice while the Gay, meaning mostly gay men but they occasionally include lesbian as a courtesy, are pushing for new rights through laws or challenging existing laws, they don't use the word "transgender" let alone include transgender people in their efforts.

Why is that? Wait, we already know, they don't like transpeople as we saw with the fight for ENDA and we've seen in the fight for marriage equality. There is no mention or explanation of what these efforts do for transpeople.

The transgender community is the one doing the work to advance laws and changes in regulations for transgender people. They've effectively left the gay, again meaning men, community out of the work and out of the conversation.

This is a position long advocating by some transgender people which I thought made sense being as gay, yes men again, only allowed transpeople if they sat quietly in the back of the bus and were invisible. And there are reasons for this.

First, they've always thought transgender women were just gay men who like to live as women and they hated that fact and reality that it wasn't true, that transwomen were women, that pesky proven issue of biology that the gay men cite as they're being gay.

Second, they've always looked at transwomen as "trannies" blatantly using the demeaning term in a degoratory way to dismiss transwomen. Gay men only consider drag queens to be the only reason men dress as women, something Ru Paul is keenly aware and defends.

Third, they've always asked the transgender community to fight for their cause and issues and promise to help them "later" but never do, as we saw over the fight in Congress with ENDA where the then HRC executive director promised inclusion until Representative Franks said no way there would be inclusion.

And now with the wins for marriage equality becoming the normal as federal judges rule against laws or state constitutional provision against same-sex marriage, the gay community is totally forgetting transgender people.

Even noted and respected journalists like Rachel Maddow ignore transgender people while talking about LGBT rights to simply use the word but never discuss the people. On MSNBC only Melissa Harris-Perry devoted a part of her weekend show to transgender people.

The point? Well, there isn't one except history is showing the transgender community do best by themselves and transgender people, and more so legally recognized women (post-transition) do even better without the transgender community.

It's about women. Where it should be. Sorry (trans)men, you're just another form of men.

Why

Transgender women of color have complained for years the issues and focus on the transgender community and movement was not just dominated but defined and controlled by white (trans)women. Now that Laverne Cox, Janet Mock, and others have celebrity status they decided they have the right to speak for all (trans)women.

If the vast majority of in-transition and post-transiton women (many of whom are stealth) don't accept the few out (trans)women, mostly white but not all, the right to define who they were or are as women (transgender optional), why should they accept women of color have the same right?

I don't see why any (trans)women would allow let alone accept another (trans)women to define them. They might agree on some of the issues facing transgender people, even I do most of the time, but I wouldn't accept any celebrity speaking for me.

It seems that some transgender women of color have chosen to do what they've long criticized white transwomen of doing. Demanding the right to speak for the many is color independent, it's all in the individual, and no one has the right or should take the right to stand up and say they speak for those they don't know.

I don't speak for you, so speak for yourself but not me.

Transition and Fat

In looking at and reading some of the blogs of transwomen, meaning those in transition, and the descriptions they give about the hormone replacement therapy (HRT) drugs they take, often with dosages listed (not recommended), and the effects over time, I'm curious why they ignore two more important factors of their life and transition.

The priorities of a transition should be, in this order, your life, your health, your fitness and your transition. Without the first three, the transition is just that where you go through it risking if not wrecking your health and fitness in the process.

And never forget you have a life above all else, because without it you get through your transition to discover you don't know what you want to do with the rest of your life. Never lose focus on where you're going as a person and fit the transition into that.

The transition will make its own schedule with your finances and life, but your life won't if you sacrifice it for your transition. My concern here is reading, and sometimes seeing in the photos, which is a puzzle to my why they post selfies but then I'm not one who likes my own body so I never take them about the changes.

It's common knowledge HRT will reduce muscle mass, often helpful, and it will add or change the fat distribution on the body, and expected with estradoil, especially with the hips and breasts. And therapists and physicians who have overseen transition will tell you adding weight, aka fat, is the result of HRT.

And often they'll tell you it's "normal" and don't worry. But it's not and doesn't have to be as you'll find if you want to lose that fat, you don't have the same metabolism  with exercise to reduce the unneeded fat and you have to work harder and longer than you did before, and the biggest risk to one's health is fat.

And it's the fat you often don't think about because it's slowly added or out of sight, such as intramuscular fat (muscle mass changes), internal fat (inside the abdomen on/around organs), arms, legs, etc., and over the course of your transition it's easy to find your self tens of pounds heavier.

I won't argue some people lose weight, but if you read the details, it's often they're physically active or continued to exercise through their transition so the HRT works on the areas it will naturally but won't add fat where it's burned in the exercise program.

And that's my point, don't sacrifice your health and fitness for something you think is good. Fat is still fat and not good for you. Some fat is helpful to help feel like and see yourself as a woman but much of it isn't, it's just fat, and over your new life will be there unless you change.

Funds

Why do women in transition seem to ask for donations to fund their transition? Yeah, obvious question since the cost of a transition depends on a number of factors but has several automatic costs, such as hair removal, therapy, doctors, drugs, clothes, etc. and the always surgeries.

The type and number of surgeries varys with the individual. Some, especially younger women, don't need cosmetic facial surgery, but most do to some extent. Some, but not most, elect to have breast augmentation surgery. And almost all, especially where it's necessary for documents but mostly personal choice, have gender affirmation surgery.

The last is often called sex or gender reassignment or confirmation surgery, but I like the feeling of gender affirmation surgery because it does what every transitioning woman wants to have for the rest of their life, the feeling and experience of their own vagina.

Anyway, back to the point. In even the most straight forward transition where the woman easily physically transition to integrate into the world as a woman, often calling passing, the cost can easily be in the $25-30,000 range, most of which will be the vaginoplasty.

If they're not so lucky and need or want additional surgeries, the cost quickly rises to $40-50,000 or more depending on the extent of the surgeries. It's only less if they have health insurance which covers part of the cost of their transtion.

But even then, breast augmentation and facial surgery is not covered by insurance and all the rest have co-pays, especially the surgery which doesn't include travel, accommodations, followup visits, etc. In short, it's not cheap.

And that often leads to some setting of accounts to donate to the transition costs. How many women who are transitioning can afford to help without taking money from their own transition? Outside of friends family, co-workers, etal, who's going to donate for a total stranger?

I'm sure many people donate to some of the women and it clearly always helps, which is why transitions should be covered by insurance. It's a known medical condition with an established treatment plan and protocol for a complete success.

I just wonder about why women out themselves to ask for donations and what they expect in terms of the amount. It's a choice if you don't have a ready source for the costs of your transition, like family which some do with supportive parents or access to a retirement, home equity or similar funds if you're older.

In any case, money seems to be the biggest impediment to transitions, and mostly for the last surgery. We need to find a better solution in the US, which are available in other countries where the costs are  covered including some surgeries, eg. Canada, Great Britain, etc.

Why

Why is it that when male journalists on TV news shows talk about "gay" rights and marriage equality only show video or images of gay men and only interview gay men or couples? Female journalists seem to balance the issue and people with men and women in the story. Don't women count or aren't part of the story when it comes to men?

Why is that when any journalist on TV takes about "LGBT" issue, they only mention the word "transgender" when saying the words in the acronym (LGBT),  but they never talk about the rights, lives and issues of transgender people? Don't they count or aren't effects by the same issues let alone those unique to them?

Yeah, statement of the obvious in the LGBT community, gay men discriminate against lesbians and both discriminate against transgender people. Not all, of course, just most.

Yes and No

Yes and No. That's the answer to several questions and while congratulations is due to Jared Leto for winning the Oscar for best supporting actor. He deserves it, but that raises the questions and the answers on both sides.

Yes, the people who made the movie, "The Dallas Buyer's Club", did have the right to pick whomever they wanted to play the role of the transgender woman with HIV since it wasn't a depiction of any real person.

But no, they didn't have the right to ignore the opportunity it would have given the many transgender actresses who could have played the part and probably better than Mr. Leto. It's one thing to credit a non-transgender (male) actor for playing a transgender woman, but totally different when someone's know the role by experience and life.

Yes, the transgender community had the right to express criticism, even outrage, at the move producers for their failure to give audtions and opportunity to transgender actresses. The producers had every obligation to give audtions.

No, the transgender community had no right to demand a transgender actress play the part unless they're willing to be the producer and write the checks.

Ok, not a real answer, but in the end, the producers missed an opportunity to help the transgender community and the transgender community missed an opportunity to engage the producers to get audtions and even a part.

But in the end, it's clear the role they wanted in the movie and it wasn't so much about a transgender woman but a supporting role to the lead roles, and Jared Leto wanted the role. That said, my congratulations to him isn't whole-hearted, but I doubt he cares because it was just a role to play than it being a real opportunity for a transgender actress.

Celebrities

Celebrity transgender women no more represent all transgender woman than actresses and models represent all women. They don't represent them in how they look or behave, what they say or with their experience. Transgender women are as diverse as all women in every aspect of being women, but more importantly they're all women and the word transgender is just a label the media uses to separate, even denigrate or demean them as women.

A Better Word

Instead of the word "passing" to describe how someone can live as their chosen gender and no one know their history, meaning their transition, I ran across a better word, "blending", meaning to just be like everyone else and no one cares to ask let alone wonder or know about their transition. A better word, to be lost among the many.

WTF

Why do people think transpeople have some mental issue, or worse some mental problem(s), simply because they've chosen to become who they know they are, to make the body match the mind, to be whole as a person in the gender they know they are?

It escapes me the stupidity of people who think transpeople have some comorbidity issues, otherwise, they wouldn't be "screwed up" and want to change the sex to match their gender. Many problems transpeople face aren't internal, within themselves, but external, from their family, friends and everything else in their life.

It escapes me they don't see transpeople as just normal people with normal problems with their own unique experience, which happens to be the unfortunate situation of their birth sex. And if they have any other mental conditions or issues it's not related and common to other people.

It escapes me they don't see the flaws in their view about transpeople on this and will just assume their view is reality, and all the arguments against them does nothing to change their mind. Go figure, maybe they're the one with the mental issues and problems.

Finally

Finally the Office of Personnel Management (OPM) is considering requiring, or at least prohibiting explicit exclusion (the current practice with all policies under the Federal Employees Health Benefit Plan (FEHB), coverage for transition care including Sex Reassignment Surgery (SRS).

This, noted here, follows the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) decision recently to include transition care in Medicare plans. Currently it's neither excluded or included, unlike the FEHB where it's excluded.

This means before (Medicare) or after (FEHB) January 1, 2015 patients undergoing transition with either Medicare or FEHB can have as much as 60-80% of their costs covered, especially the major costs of SRS, which can run $12-15,000 overseas or $20-25,000 in the US.

It's likely any coverage will be for US surgeons but there isn't a lack of them, only the waiting time varys from a few months to 6-9 months depending on the surgeon. But as with some health coverage, patients may still have to pay (always full payment up front with SRS) and get reimbursed.

Some surgeons are in some state or local government health plans because their clinic is in the state which makes coverage through the insurance company. Companies which cover it usually do so through riders with their employees health plans and pays direct for the employee minus other costs such as travel, lodging, etc.

This is good news for active or retired federal government employees and those on Medicare. Currently some coverage is defaulted in the health plans, such as drugs, therapy and etc because they're not sex/gender specific than specific to transitioning people.

But it took four years after President Obama endorsed a letter to OPM on LGBT issues which instructed OPM to act on the health insurance coverage. And a good number of patients under FEHB have either paid out of pocket or delayed finishing their transition because of the time for this decision.

At least OPM got there, and so in the 2015 policies people under the FEHB will not see the words, "Sex transformation services and surgery excluded" in the plan coverage brochure and an explanation of the coverage based on the status of the provider (preferred, general or other).

Not Always

When people who have transitioned talk to those who are considering or in therapy to start their transition or who are in their transition, these people always tell you to go ahead, don't hesitate, come out, go public, be fulltime, and take charge of who you are and your life.

It's often the advice Nike gives, "Just do it", something you expect from the one minute manager expert. These people are usually the ones who often passed as women before or during their transition, who didn't need cosmetic facial surgery, who didn't need very much facial or body hair removal and for whom hormones had an extraordinary change to their face and body.

In short they easily and readily passed. Or if not, they found or had the money to get cosmetic facial surgery and/or breast augmentation surgery. In other words, once they decided they went full speed through their transition through their Sex Reassignment Surgery and got on with their life.

And so they can hand out that advice like candy, they did it so everyone else should do the same, or as some often say, "You're not a true transwoman.", meaning they're the ones who subvertly decide who's true and right or not.

They will always tell their story of hardships and challenges, and how they overcame them or got through them to transition. They'll will always talk about well they were seen and accepted as women, forgetting how easily they passed.

This is often true of those who become public figures or celebrities as transgender women, accepting that word as who they are, but then always arguing they're also just women, like other women, except their experience is different.

They argue they're trying to change the public perception and image of "transgender" women, meaning calling anyone who is transitioning or has transitioned is transgender by definition, theirs and the public's, even if the woman doesn't want the label.

They either forget or disregard those who don't follow their path and advice. And unfortunate for those who can't and have to live with the stereotype these women set and the stigma of how they fail. These women argue against stereotypes while being one themselves.

Not all women transition like they do, and in fact, most don't, taking longer because of work, family, money, health, fitness, time and other reasons or factors. Some take a long time to or don't even transition because they're more afraid they'll be worse off and not accepted if they do transition, and to them, life of quiet desparation is better than a life of public isolation.

We forget that at the heart of this is someone's own gender identity inside the physical body genetics, time, experience and circumstance gave them, and that along with the realities of the transition, especially the cost, overshadows everything anyone else can say about them.

To all those public transgender women, I say to your words and advice, not always. And don't speak for anyone else and especially all transwomen, just speak for yourself.

Goal

A goal of many people, especially those who transition, is to lie in bed naked and feel a body which is complete and whole, and is everything you are and want to be and nothing else from who you were. To lie quietly in bed and feel your own existence as you know and feel.

Who can argue against something even genetic (cis)gender people know about themselves? So, what's all the fuss, and even the anger, about transpeople wanting to know the same about themselves? Don't we all want that goal?

Photo credit

FWIW

For what it's worth, a post-transition, legally recongized female woman is not a transgender woman. She can be considered to have been a transgender woman, past tense, but once she is post-op and legally female, the word (adjective) transgender can not and should not be used to describe her as a woman. She is just female and a woman.

Now if only the media would learn to get their facts right, but then just calling her just a woman doesn't sell stories. And to me, any post-transition woman who still calls herself a transgender woman needs to rethink why she transitioned, unless of course it's not about that but being noticed.

It's one thing to call yourself a transgender woman because it helps other similar women or the transgender community, but does it really, selling a sexual stereotype isn't what other transitioning women need or want to be accepted and live their life as women, to always be thought of and compared to media stereotypes.

Or do all the stereotype "transgender" women simply want the attention? Maybe it's why so many women transition and live after their transition out of the media and stealth. Who wants to always be called a transgender woman? Who want to always reminded of their past? Who wants to always be asked why they're not like those in the media?

If you have to think about it, then you don't understand.

Do Not Confuse the Two

The transgender community is praising the Health and Human Service (HHS) agency for extending the ban on discrimination against transgender people under the Affordable Care Act (ACA), but don't confuse it with banning discrimination for health insurance coverage.

The HHS agency did not ban exclusions for transgender health care, especially medically approved and required surgery, aka Sex Reassignment Surgery (SRS), only that the companies can't reject a transgender person or deny claims under the plans.

The health insurance plans overseen and/or managed by the federal government under the ACA, under Medicare and under the Federal Employees Health Benefit (FEHB) plans still exclude coverage for "sex transformation", including and explicitly SRS.

While top 500 companies, some small companies and business, universities, organization and states cover transition healthcare including SRS, the federal government does not under all their health insurance programs.

Banning discrimination of people isn't banning discrimination of coverage. It's time the HHS and Office of Personel Management (OPM) fix the latter and add appropriate coverage for insurers under their programs.

HHS is doing a review for Medicare but not the ACA or is OPM doing it for the FEHB. Those need to be challenged since the President has directed them to change the policy for inclusion of people and healthcare.