Being Oversensitive

After sitting on the sidelines watching the transcommunity for a number years, researching the history of the community, organizations, people, events, issues, and so on, and occasionally participating in discussions, I've come to the conclusion, really from my first group meeting, the transcommunity and especially the transgender part of the community, meaning mostly cross-dressers and transistioning women, are over sensitive and don't know when someone is making a point to poke fun, spark discussion, lighten the discussion or is making a tongue-in-cheek comment.

Not surprisingly few trans men join transgroups because historically they have a built-in support group in lesbian groups. Since they are female to male, most are or were butch lesbian (some use dykes), they don't need the transcommunity. For now anyway. Some lesbian groups are kicking transmen out because they want lesbians, not former lesbians turned straight guys. And they're not liking the testosterone effect on their former lesbians.

But that's off the point. Anyway, my point is that most of the people in the transcommunity haven't learned to lighten up in discussion and they take almost everything too seriously, especially internal opposition. And that's when it's worse. Question views or expresss alternative opinions or ideas and you will be verbally pummelled, if not expelled. As I have learned. Up to that point, you'll get criticized by the diehard transpeople (again mostly transwomen).

Extreme view? Maybe, but look at the recent situation with the appointment of Amanda Simpson to the Department of Commerce. I wrote as the first she will be the "token" women with a transgender past at such levels of government and she maybe (note maybe) a puppet for both sides, the administration to promote LGBT people and the transcommunity to promote one of them.

Except as I noted she's not one of them. She transistioned long ago and is legally female, not trans of any flavor, that's her past or history, not her present or future. And yes, she did work on LGBT boards and with LGBT groups as a transrepresentative. She even used it in her polticial campaign years ago. But now she's just a woman in a job.

It was the transcommunity who promoted the news release of a "transgender appointment" to the administration. And then they whined with the flak began. I kidding the "whining" part, but it was to be expected by the conservative and religious groups. What didn't the transcommunity not understand or see. They fired the first volley and didn't expect return fire, often as usually happens, very insulting and degrading?

It's why I walked away from the transcommunity and other than continue to watch from the sidelines, I don't get involved. There are many outsanding people and groups in the community, but like every larger issue, there are the often loud but always serious voices who don't tolerate opposition and especially dissent. And worst of all, they don't tolerate humor.

Don't poke fun at them in jest, least you want a verbal beating from members. I've always subscribe to the idea to take your issues serioulsy but not yourself seriously. But then always discuss any issue with an open mind and heart, to listen, understand and talk with honesty, fairness and always with some humor. There's humor in everything, it's makes life easier to swallow.

Unfortunately, in spite of all the good people in and good work of the transcommunity, they haven't learned to just smile at life. After all, it's funny it's in own right, just open your eyes and see. You'll feel better and learn to be more understanding and accepting, and yes, of opposition within and anger from outside.