Like many people, I'm a member of many Internet commuities and forums. Many are the predecessors to Websites like Facebook and Twitter where you can communicate with many people of similar lives or with similar interests. They were a godsend to many who felt isolated or for many who didn't have access to larger avenues for sharing. And as the Internet grew the number of forums for many topics have increased.
I belong to about half a dozen or so, some I visit daily, some routinely during the week, and some just a few times per month. It's understood that the owner has the right to set the rules and the owner and moderators have the right to set the tone. You're the visitor or guest, you behave for face eviction. That's obvious, but what's less obvious is the subtle bias and discrimination that creeps into them.
Recently on one the topic turned to inclusion or exclusion, both within the community and to the community by society at large. The community is a pretty big umbrella group covering a vast range of human identity, expression, and behavoir. And yes, it's been a group which has been discriminated against for decades and even today (and no it's not the lgb community). Yet, while they profess to be inclusive for its members, it actually is quite exclusive, and worse, discriminating against its own members.
So, why do owners of forum profess inclusion but then practice exlcusion when the topic wanders into areas they're uncomfortable or with views expressed by members they disagree? I don't know, but recently some of my posts were removed and then my account was removed. Without giving notice and reasons. And then the owner changed the rules to ban talk on the topic and views expressed by quite a few members.
The problem with the decision, which they're right to do because they own the forum, is that they and the moderators routinely post news stories and editiorials about the same topic and people write posts expressing the same view they banned and then deleted members. And the owners and moderators routinely criticize the opposing view.
It was a total suprise to me, as I have never criticized individuals. From my years in senior management I have always practiced focusing on the subject of the discussion and the ideas, views, opinions, issues, etc. under discussion. Never have I criticized an individual, only what they said. And never in the spirit of hate, because I like these conversations, and am always smiling for one good reason.
As the saying goes, I take my work and/or issues seriously but I never take myself seriously. I know my view or opinion is just one of many, Not better or worse, just different. Not more or less important, all are equal. While some people have more experience, knowledge or understanding, and can express more intelligent views and opinions, it still doesn't lessen the views and opinions of others.
And that is what floored me seeing my "username does not exist" when I tried to log in today. I sent the owner an e-mail (you can still read the forum except the member-only topics) explaining my position and her failure to understand. I doubt anything will change. For one reason.
She professes that everyone with this identity should be in the community whether or not they want to, whether or not they care to, and whether or not they changed and moved on with their lives. She believes once in your always in. That's her tragedy of understanding and compassion. And her bias to both discriminate against those who disagree with her and to remove anyone who expresses it.
So, it's one forum now I read for the same reasons I did before, I just can't post anymore. And my view is that I would recommend this forum for the many excellent and terrific members, they're great at providing the information and support you want and need. I won't, however, recommend anyone become members because the owner discriminates against members of her own community, just over words.
So to her, as much as I would like to tell her, "GFY.", I won't. You see I don't criticize people, just their decisions, actions and views, and always with a smile out of enjoyment for conversation. And yes, I'd like to be the sheepdog holding the wolf (her).
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