First Protect Yourself

There's been a lot of discussion lately in the media about whether a transitioning woman should disclose to anyone on their first date who, and really what, she is, where many people, including some very out transpeople, have not just recommended but advocated, disclosure.

Personally, to me, it's all about first protect yourself, which means, don't disclose your status as a transwomen (in-transition) or your history (post-transition) until there is good reason, you know the other person more, and you're in a safe place (not their place where you're trapped).

I don't agree with Buck Angel and the lot of them who say being out from the start is good, it's not. It's dangerous to you, and can be life-threatening if other people, not just those you're with, but those who hear, know or discover, decide they don't like you and take their anger, hate and rage out on you.

This wasn't an argument years ago when the leading post-transition women were advocate privacy until it a necessity to disclose, like intimate relationships, and you know, which is really hope, your partner is  understanding. But history and the data have shown, that's rarely the case.

There are many good reasons for being stealth, and despite the anger of some in the transcommunity about being stealth, especially post-transition, it's the best advice and best bet. And the worst advice is listening to the likes of folks like Buck Angel, etal. on this subject.

Always think about your personal safety and security first. And screw the rest of them if they don't get it or don't like you for your decision. They don't live your life, you do, and that's your priority.